“If you want others to be happy, practice compassion. If you want to be happy, practice compassion.” Dalai Lama

Have you ever noticed that the minute you declare that you are going to do something powerful, renewing and uplifting, everything unlike that comes up to be healed?

You start the day with your heart open wide and willing to express love to those around you. And then stuff happens. You find out your co-workers forgot to invite you to the Zoom call meeting, and you were left out. Your brother failed to show up for his turn at taking care of your parents, leaving you to step up once again. Your spouse complains about the delicious meal you spent the afternoon preparing.

So the community that you were ready to embrace, love and be compassionate for just pushed your buttons and poked at your tender wounds. Your belief in unworthiness was activated, secretly making you feel less than, invisible and unappreciated.

One of the most important tools for emotional healing is self-compassion. Author Tara Brach says what we need is radical compassion,“recognizing the vulnerability of all life in our heart. It means having the courage to love ourselves, each other, and our world.”

We start by freeing ourselves from the stories of the past, letting go of blame and criticism. We can’t control anyone behavior but we can learn to respond rather than react. We find ways to nurture and encourage ourselves the way we would reassure and inspire our best friend. We learn to tell a new story about who we are and what we are capable of accomplishing.

The courage to love and appreciate ourselves, opens us to love and accept others just as they are.

Affirmation: I love and accept myself. I see my divine reflection in others.